13 Weeks - Peached Az Bro

With Andy's favourite number, today we are at 13 weeks! Wasn't sure what to call his week's post... considered Princess Peach, Dill Murray, and one for my mother, Dill Clinton: ImPEACHed! 

Baby is ~6.62 cm long and (according to google search) roughly the size of a peach, pickle, pea pod or espresso cup. Where did I get the exact CRL measurement you ask? (CRL: crown to rump length - I read the books. and websites. and Q&As. and obsession?) Well..... we had our second scan yesterday! Here are the stats:

• Heart beat is 153 (exactly what it said it should be in my pregnancy science book - little mr/miss perfect already)
• Nuchal fold was ~1.5mm (well under the 3.0mm high end threshold)
• Lots of movement and well above the average adorableness range

Still waiting for the complete blood and scan combo results but taking no news as good news. Only got one photo. We did get a bunch of scans that says REFERRING DOCTOR TO OPEN but with my MacGyver skills and long thick prenatal vitamin nails I've already looked at them 4 times.

Presenting baby Affleck 2014:

Although eerily similar looking, it is NOT in fact the scary 1960's inflatable Bobo Doll. We saw other shots and baby's legs were crossed and arms were crossed up by its head. Just your average fetus lounging on an amniotic pool raft. 

My dad thought it looked like him and Andy's mum thought it was a spitting image of Andy at that age. I think it looks like me, however I currently do look like an inflatable punching clown. (In all honesty all I could think was "Poor thing already got my underbite... orthodontic fund stat".)

I'll leave it up to the blog public to decide:

This week we have a surprise guest contributor! Now that we have officially seen baby Affleck and know it's there and growing, Andy wrote it a little letter. Feel free to tear up... mama almost did (hey, it's no MKR commercial). 

Dear Child to Be (CTB).

Welcome to Earth. Your mother and I are very happy to bring you into the world. Before we get started, let's address the elephant in the room: yes it's true, you weren't planned. But, we both love surprises and you're the greatest little surprise we could ask for. Given your mother and I are terrible at keeping a secret, you are probably the last surprise we'll ever have again.  

We won't ask for much. All I ask is you don't arrive Grand Final weekend. I'll even be prepared to share my birthday with you -- hey, we can share our 18th and 50th birthday parties kiddo.

Love,

Dad to be. 

• How far along: 13 weeks
• Total weight gain: Up a pound, 2 lbs from the start total. Belly is definitely bigger though.
• Maternity clothes? No but lots of leggings and baggy shirts
• Stretch marks? No
• Sleep: No problems, knock on wood
• Best moment this week: Farted Oporto fries scent. Seriously. Spitting (smelling?) image... AND going to Sydney with friends and seeing Lion King
• Miss Anything? Beer and feta (again)
• Movement: Not feeling anything but bubs was hopping around like crazy during the scan
• Food cravings: Indian (the cuisine... no cannibal cravings yet)
• Anything making you queasy or sick: Tip: Don't smell your own pee cup when giving a sample. You WILL vomit.
• Gender: Girl for sure, even Andy jumped on the girl bandwagon
• Labor Signs: No
• Symptoms: settling down, just shortness of breath and dizziness 
• Belly Button: Way In 
• Wedding rings: On
• Mood: Gradually improving each week 
• Looking forward to: Getting all the test results back and pram shopping! (Andy is stooooooked)

12 Weeks - Cream of Plum Yung Gai

We made it! According to the world wide web, 12 weeks is about the time most people feel comfortable making pregnancy official. Apparently you aren't really pregnant until Facebook knows. If that's true, I've been pregnant for a few years now because FB has kindly taken to advertising fertility herbs and baby yoga and since I approached my late 20s. While I appreciate FB's "ticking biological clock" advertisements I think I'll reveal all next week after my 12 1/2 week scan is complete. I know I know, get on with it already, but the W^3 will be aware soon. Here's a fun fact, it looks likes this blog has been viewed like 18 times in Vietnam. Not kidding! I would officially like to say:

"Chào mừng bạn đến 18 người theo tiếng Việt của tôi ... hoặc một đầu đọc phía đông nam châu Á rất đam mê."

or loosely translated:

"Welcome to my 18 Vietnamese followers... or one very passionate southeast asian reader/stalker." 

As far as I know Baby A is developing well. Honestly I have NFI but I've been getting dizzy and fat so I think that's a good sign. I have to admit that I've also been a little more lenient with my eating this week. I had a salad with feta and bagels with cream cheese. GASP! Call social services! Granted, the salad only touched feta and I got the mini cream cheese tubs so they are freshly opened each time. Ok ok, maybe I'm being a wee bit anal retentive. But to make my point, let's look at when people say, 

"Well back in my day we ate, drank, smoked whatever we wanted and my kids turned out fine!" 

Did they though? Did they really turn out FINE? Hello people!?!? It's 2014 and we STILL don't have flying cars. I can't speak for you but I for one am really counting on this future generation to give little Shaylalynn Jo her flying confederate flag decaled truck, Leif RainCloud his soaring VW Bus and Pat Ellen-Portia her airborne Subaru Outback. Now that's what I call FINE! 

Jess reminded me that Baby will be born in time for Halloween! So please feel free to help with costume ideas. Baby will have a costume even if we only wear it around the house. It's not like I have a pet to torture and andy only lets me dress him up bi-annually... so Baby it's all you! Thanks to the addictive soul stealing Pinterest here are some top contenders: 

Warning: Cuteness overload. Hold on to your ovaries ladies.

Unfortunately, unless I can find someone who can crochet (hint hint Jess) or sew (hint hint Karin) looks like this is #1 in the "Most Likely Costume to Actually Happen" category:

• How far along: 12 weeks
• Total weight gain: Actually down a lb, but pants are super snug
• Maternity clothes? Bought my first maternity t-shirt. Still too big.
• Stretch marks? No
• Sleep: Good
• Best moment this week: I learned a couple valuable lessons. 1: To avoid diarrhea do not eat 1/2 a bag of prunes in one sitting. 2: To avoid projectile vomiting don't scoff down a Macca's cheeseburger then run to catch the train. 3: To make your wrestling weight class disregard aforementioned warnings
• Miss Anything? Energy
• Movement: Not yet
• Food cravings: Mac n' Cheese... can't wait to get the TMNT ones in the US!
• Anything making you queasy or sick: Sitting for long periods of time...  especially after eating
• Gender: Hmmm... think it's a girl but keep referring to it as a "he". Major gender identity confusion?
• Labor Signs: No
• Symptoms: Dizzy, fatigue, bakers dozen muffin top, bloat, nails nice and thick
• Belly Button: In
• Wedding rings: On
• Mood: roller-coasterish 
• Looking forward to: being home alone (+ fetus) this weekend with Thai and TV

11 Weeks - Optimus Lime

For my 11th birthday I got a Dairy Queen ice cream cake with a horse on it that said "Lucky 11"! I remember thinking I was so clever with that cute little rhyme. I have a Dr's check up, ultrasound and a couple blood tests this coming week to test for baby and mama health... needless to say I hope that "Lucky 11" holds and everything goes well. 

Compared to week 10 my mood has been a bit better (aka. not such a psycho hose beast).  To Andy's relief, looks like 1st tri hormones are settling down slightly. Granted I teared up at a MKR commercial (again), almost punched a hole in the library wall, and have a new found hatred for males wearing handmade capris. I don't care how hipster you think you are or how cool they are in your home country, for the love of god, give the midgets back their pants!

Baby is now the size of a lime and, unless it is a mini Joseph Stalin, all of the webbing between the toes and fingers should have receded by now. Nail beds continue to form and it still sports a 1:1 head to body ratio. 

I tried to take a bump photo but just looked gross and fat (and was embarrassed by the messy house). After a few loud door slams and restraining myself from smashing my phone, you are getting a blurry angry faced photo and pregnant guinea pig. Enjoy.

• How far along: 11 weeks
• Total weight gain: hard to tell... not much on the scale but feels like this: 

     (8 year old indian boy included)

• Maternity clothes? No, but going to look for a Bella Band (or similar) tomorrow 
• Stretch marks? No
• Sleep: Good... body feels sooo exhausted but head isn't that tired
• Best moment this week:  hmmm...pretty average week. got an awesome burger at Grilled... does that count? And Andy just texted me "yolo".
• Miss Anything? American food! (e.g., taco bell, Mrs Grass soup, Garden Burgers, crispy bacon, diner hash browns, breakfast sausage, Gardettos) and salad bars
• Movement: Heaps, but all stuff I'm about to throw up
• Food cravings: bacon
• Anything making you queasy or sick: looking at our bank account
• Gender: Have switched sides and now putting my bets on girl
• Labor Signs: No
• Symptoms: Bit of morning afternoon sickness, body is so exhausted after just walking home from school
• Belly Button: In
• Wedding rings: On
• Mood: Dear Neighbours: DO YOU REALLY HAVE TO BLOW LEAVES AROUND EVERY FKING DAY ALL DAY? IF I HAD A SHOTGUN! Dear Mother Nature and my Blinds: AND THE WIND! SO LOUD! SHUT UP WIND! Dear Andy: DID YOU JUST SERIOUSLY LEAVE THE SARAN WRAP OUT AGAIN? Dear Guy on Bus: IT'S CALLED DEODORANT YOU SMELLY PIECE OF SHIT .... sorry, was good earlier this week. today... yeah not so much.
• Looking forward to: Eating BLT's and omelettes  

10 Weeks - Reese Witherprune

10 weeks! A quarter of the way there or one lap of the four we used to have to do in the high school PE 8 minute mile (still haunts me obviously). Spent the weekend down in Melbourne and it was great to see a bunch of our southern friends. Unfortunately, I've been sick as a dog sick person. A bit of the classic preggo symptoms (e.g., nausea, headaches, fatigue) but also have had a bad cold and because of this little fetus I'm not allowed to take any drugs. This week I've single handedly raised Kleenex's shares 10-fold and my bed now sports a fully embossed butt print.

Enough about me... baby Aff is now the size of a prune! What to Expect says that it has little dimples where knees and ankles are forming. Cuuuuute overload! Did I mention that I went baby shopping with Mazeta on Sunday and I am now planning on dressing baby in denim? A lot of denim. Think Brittany Spears/JT circa 2001 and the canadian tuxedo. I'm pretty sure I will also need to get a mini polo shirt, for the last minute newborn yachting trips obviously. 

    

Speaking of Mizzy (and Adam), I would like to give them a quick shout-out for buying baby it's first  (and already my favourite) rhyming book. Here is a quick excerpt: 

The wind whispers soft through the grass, hon.

The field mice, they make not a peep.

It's been thirty-eight minutes already.

Jesus Christ, what the f**k? Go to sleep.

The seeds slumber beneath the earth now

And the crops that the farmers will reap. 

No more questions. This interview's over.

I've got two words for you, kid: F*****g sleep.

Also tried on my first pair of maternity jeans. Where have these been all of my life??? Haven't bought any yet as I'm trying to go as long as possible forgoing pants all together, but looking forward to getting some turkey trousers when the temperature drops. I also attempted my first pregnancy selfie. Pretty crap effort, but I was hungry and that prune didn't last long.

How far along: 10 weeks
Total weight gain: 1.5 lbs (but feels like sooo much more)
Maternity clothes? Not yet
Stretch marks? No
Sleep: Difficult because of inability to breathe.. so. much. snot.
Best moment this week: having a proper bowel movement! baby size = prune. coincidence? 
Miss Anything? Ricotta, blue cheese dressing, hot salami
Movement: No, but a few growth pains
Food cravings: Fruit, salad and fruit/sour candy
Anything making you queasy or sick: Opening the dishwasher
Gender: ??? Keep dreaming it's a boy though
Labor Signs: No
Symptoms: A little of everything and a lot of a head cold
Belly Button: In
Wedding rings: On
Mood: Bit grumpy this week. Cried during J&A's wedding and watching My Kitchen Rules
Looking forward to: Getting over this cold and getting back on track at school next week